Real Update on Garden and Healthy Life

Right.

So, first things first; my garden! It seems to actually be coming along now.

Yes, it still looks mostly like a garden of bottles, but things are growing under the bottles. See.
And, I actually have 3 broccoli plants that may live. Yay!

And my spinach is doing quite well.

I also have my first flower on a pea plant!

I now have kale, chard, lettuce, endive, peas, watermelon, cucumber, squash, broccoli, tomato, spinach, carrots, basil, and (maybe) stevia growing. I need to weed again and replant the pepper seeds. I also have several seedlings indoors. I'm waiting to let them get a little bigger and a little tougher before I figure out where to put them outside. I still have some spots where things could go, particularly in the partly shaded part of the garden things are more sparse, and I could add a few plants. I also need to plant a couple more basil, or actually give in and get some of the other herbs I've been considering. I've transplanted the thyme and the oregano into bigger pots as well.

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Healthy/healthy eating.

Still doing to no sweeteners thing, still loving it. Apparently I also lost 8 pounds last month, rather than the usual 5 that had been happening. I don't know how I feel about that. Part of me is very pleasantly surprised. Another part of me feels very obsessively greedy about this weight loss and wants it to continue at this pace for the rest of the summer and wants to count and recount the possible pounds I could lose (dysfunctional much? yeesh). The third part of me, seeing the second part, thinks that maybe anything other than minimal weight loss would be a bad thing and that I shouldn't step on a scale again for a few months.

I have also had the pleasure of being introduced to a local egg seller who sells a dozen eggs cheaper than the local grocery, even though her eggs are truly free range and humanely raised. Haha, and now I'm wondering where I'm going to find anything so awesome in DC.

Ate quite a few things that had sugar in them yesterday and felt quite sick for most of the day. Wasn't very hungry for most of today, but found myself positively starving at the end of the day. I've just resigned myself to go to bed with a growling stomach because it's not reasonable to eat more. I had a cup of milk, sauteed red potatoes, whole wheat noodles, several cups of steamed kale, a fruit leather, an orange, and beef. My stomach stopped making noises for all of two minutes before it started up again.

I'm a little concerned about my skin/muscle tone if I loose weight very quickly. I'm also afraid I'm going to stop losing, which is why I didn't want to even think about weight loss when I started.

I think I'm going to have to spend this week getting my goals strait again.

Ah, also, speaking of health, on the social health front; my friend R was lovely yesterday. I never leave hanging out with her except that I'm in awe of how great she is. Among other things she was very encouraging about my interest in doing Krav Maga when I get to DC and also in my change in health. She too, has gotten a little healthier lately and I think she looks quite nice. Her life situation has also gotten drastically less stressful recently and I think you can see that in her face and demeanor.

I also hung out with M. She is quite small; a size 0, if I'm not mistaken, and my comparison of us always triggers my stereotype threat. It's not her fault, it's mine. I'm very sensitive to size differences. I'm getting better about not being triggered around her, or other people, but it's still quite embarrassing that I feel it's there so I tend to bring it up. The elephant in my own room. I end up talking about weight virtually every time I'm with her. When I first met her it was horrible, I couldn't get myself to shut up.

Yesterday, in response to something I said, she said "I've always seen you as beautiful," which is very kind and such a vicious slap in the face to the (ugly, dysfunctional, wrong) voice in my head telling me she's only my friend because she pities the "fat girl" that I'm not entirely sure I didn't flinch when she said it. Then I said something self-effacing, which was neither right nor constructive. *sigh* Sometimes you have good days, sometimes bad days. Sometimes, I can't help but wonder why she puts up with me.

Update on Garden and Gatherings

Two things.

First, my garden is coming along. Things seem to be growing now, and most of the spots where I planted have living plants. I spent a good portion of Sunday weeding and I have more beer. I will post a picture as soon as I either A. get around to putting batteries in my big clunky digital POS camera, or B. clean my room enough that I can find my phone's memory card and put it back in the phone.

Second, I have been to two more social outings with bread and products with sugar in them. Both times it resulted in stomach cramping and not being hungry the next day. I'm beginning to contemplate whether I should just stop eating those things all together, or whether allowing it sometimes is what is going to allow me to keep up the no sweeteners thing at all other times.

Had a spot of weight/beauty obsession the last couple days. Hopefully it's done with now.

I'm serious people, and this is something I have to tell myself as well, there is no such thing as a "standard of beauty." All things can be beautiful. And there is no such thing as a "healthy weight" if you're truly healthy, your weight is healthy.

Be happy.

What is this?

It's growing in my row of kale, but it doesn't look like any of the other kale. I had it under a bottle so at some point it must have looked like the others.
I tried looking it up and the closest I came to a similar kale plant is red russian kale. Interestingly, I didn't buy any packages of red russian kale. So, did a red russian seed get mixed amongst the others or is this a mimic week?

Is it Russian Kale,or an imposter?

Garden Slugs and Garden Plants

I have pictures! Please forgive the poor quality, my cell phone's camera sucks and I lost my Photoshop when my old computer crashed. Wait, there's an online program for that.. Heh, the next ones will probably be better then!

First, I set out the beer traps last night and this is what I found this morning.

Lots of them in the saucers. They appear to prefer Bud Lite to Guinness (thank God).
Scooped them out and left them to dry in the sun.
These ones were mostly between an inch and an inch and a half though
in some of the other containers there were two inch ones. Ick



More slugs in beer filled saucers

Still more slugs in a beer filled saucer. I have six of these out, plus two
beer bottles with the dregs left in. I hope these slimy frat boys drown in
their own vomit (as opposed to real frat boys, who I hope outgrow drinking).

 This is my sage from last year that I planted near the house. It seems to be doing quite well and has started to put out little leaves, you can see them as the bright green ones and I'm very hopeful that it will grow quite well. I'm considering whether or not I should buy some other herbs, such as lavender or rosemary,or just stick with my oregano, thyme, basil, cilantro, and mint. 

This is a shot of my garden. It still looks leafy and brown in this (terrible) picture but I assure you things *are* growing. Fro some reason when the sun is up my camera completely washes out the color . That being said, if you look in the bottom center of the picture you can see my peas growing.

 

This is actually one of my small spinach plants. See! things are growing. I feel as though they're growing very slowly though. Speaking of growing, I read up on broccoli and I think I may have put mine out while they were too small. That might explain why they were gobbled up. I'm still trying. Hopefully it's not too late for them.

 My yard. I know, it needs mowing, but it's all purple and white with the pretty little flowers! Awwww!

 And Finally, my cat, sitting outside in the flowers with me, and enjoying the company. He loves to wander around and distract me while I'm in the garden. He thinks it's wonderful.

General Update on all things Healthy (slugs, onions, exhaustion)

Well, I've lost a little more weight. It's not the goal (not the goal, not the goal, not the goal), but it's nice to know. I wonder if I'm nursing a migraine this week, because I've been quite tired and I feel a little strange. I haven't worked out much, though I've tried to make sure I walk a little more, stand a little more, and I got on the throwing wheel for a while yesterday, so that I'm getting some exercise in. I just feel really tired.

It could be allergies (all the trees have bloomed) or stress (big test this weekend, finances), or hormones (it could always be hormones), or it could be that I haven't slept solidly in about 4 days. I thought that little bit of trouble would be a one night phenomena, but apparently not. I had begun to take vitamins before bed so I'm going to try not taking them before bed and see if the sleep returns to what it should be (note: I have gone through periods of months where sleep was broken/difficult almost constantly. It was horrible and I'm eager to avoid a repeat).

I went to Burnheim forest again, though only ended up staying a few hours because...poop! Yes, my tummy was very rumbly (test stress?) and pooping in an outhouse without tp and running water is not appealing.

I have also been craving strong vegetables today; onions, mushroom, pickles. I can't get enough of them. I've noticed a craving for fresh onions and mushrooms the last few days. As well as sweets. I actually caved today and bought a small lemon-glazed biscuit today, because I could. It was delicious. I just sat in the car and enjoyed it.

I also bought beer. Bud lite. Ick. But, it's not for me; it's for the slugs. Those nasty nasty slugs. I hope their livers explode. I have saucers laid out around the edge of the garden as well as a couple of the beer bottles with just a little at the bottom set in the garden. I talked to one of the gardeners at the Otte garden center (gosh, have they gotten a lot of my money, but they actually seem to have people who know what they're talking about) and he said that it's almost too late to plant broccoli. So, I hope they come up, or that the ones I'm still growing indoors will not die when I put them outside.

The lawn also needs mowing.

On a pleasant note; my grocery bill was quite small this week because I didn't seem to use up as much food as usual. Quite possibly I'm subsisting off lattes and cafeteria salads. I should probably make extra effort to eat only from home this week.

And, finally, I am looking forward to summer, even though I do *HATE* the heat.

General Garden Update

The cilantro, which probably spent too much time indoors, seem a bit beaten by the strong breeze, so I've helped secure them with toothpicks and a wiretie. One of what I originally thought would be cilantro is probably going to turn out to be endive. Oops. That's what happens when seeds stick to your wet fingers. Sometimes you find them in unexpected places.

The brocolli seems to be having an especially hard time growing, or staying. It seems like the ones I ground sow aren't sprouting and the ones I gew indoors don't survive long outside. I'm not sure what's getting to them, but right now I have one, maybe two, of an originally panted 7, and that second one could die any moment. It's practically just a stalk. It was under the cup/bottle, so I'm not sure what got to it to eat the leaves, but something did.

Some of the kale has sprouted, and in some spots where I planted nothing has sprouted. I'm not sure why. I don't know if I should replant once a week until something does sprout.

I have planted all the pouches of my hanging garden with basil. I suspect I need to put my thyme and my oregano outside but I worry about whatever was digging in the garden getting to them. I still have some limited space in the garden proper for potted plants, so they might go there. I'm hoping the mint will be fine, though I'm wondering if, perhaps, I should put it on the chair.

The lettuce is coming up nicely, though some of my seedlings have taken on a particularly purple hue that I don't understand. Is this natural? I don't know.

I am also trying to make use of my remaining bird net. If I can use it to sequester off other parts of the garden, say, near the fence, it will be quite usefull.

Aside from that, I very much wish I was still on the no sweetner at all diet.
It was easier, and I felt better, to just turn everything down.

My Garden is Growing

Well, just about everything has sprouted a bit.

I was having trouble with something digging in my garden so I've put down bird net and cayenne pepper. The bird net has knocked over many of the bottles, and catches on my fingers, but I don't see any plants devoured by anything other than, possibly, a slug. Certainly, there seems to be no more digging. Yay! I suspect this problem will arise again later.
That said. I have now planted:
Kale
Chard
Spinach
Lettuce
Carrots
Peppers
Broccoli
endive
Snow Peas
one cucumber plant
one other plant that is like cucumber (squash? can't remember. Oops)

Also, the potted things have been seeded. I put tomato seeds in all the pots with the yellow sticks in them. I transplanted most of my cilantro to the other pots you see there.

In my hanging garden I have now put seeds in 12 of the little sacks. All basil. I bought some sweet basil seeds at the store because, frankly, I ran out. I might buy lemon basil too, because that tasted quite lovely last year. It's likely that most, if not all, of my hanging garden will be basil. You can see the mint plant in the previous picture and it should do quite well. I have a potted oregano and thyme which might need bigger pots but certainly I don't need another plant and they seem healthy, and the sage that I planted next to the back door may actually be making new leaves. This leaves a few random spots in the yard where I'm considering whether I should plant a tomato or try for some other kind of herb, or simply try to inundate myself with greens.

Next time I will get out my big ugly camera and take some pictures of the seedlings.

Too Much Junk

I think I may need to revise my "will only eat unhealthy food in social situations offering food" to "will only eat unhealthy food in very special social situations." Needless to say, eating junk almost three days in a row (brownie and pudding and a corn dog at cg, 3 root beer floats over 2 days at my mother's house, white bread and a brownie and coke zero at an art demo) resulted in a low level migraine for three days and plenty of my stomach and joints just generally disliking me. That said, brownies are awesome. I am not disappointed by brownies. LOL.

And, so, my feelings about sweets make it very strange that they are such a standard in our culture. I wanted to thank my references for writing me such wonderful letters for grad school. So, yesterday, I went to Wholefoods and picked out a special thing for each of them from the pastry case. I did it because culturally this is an acceptable gift. But am I poisoning them? Surely they would not prefer a boiled egg and a green pepper as a thank you.

Plugging an awesome blog

This is a great blog, and very much what I've been going through in my quest to be healthy. I think I almost died of laughter. The cat thought I was having some sort of attack.

The Terrible Tragedy of the Healthy Eater

You Don't Need to Change Your Vagina

Body love is body love. Love your body, love your vagina.

Grown women have grown women's vaginas, and grown women's vaginas are bigger, and darker, and curlier, and hairier than a little girl's. If it's not sick, don't change it. Don't let a sick society tell you that there's something wrong or ugly about you when there's not. Stand proud! Be your natural beautiful you! And, if a man you're with, or who you talked to,is so indoctrinated that he thinks that the flat, child-like, plastic, porn star vagina is the only one he'll take then drop the asswipe (or, say "fair's fair" and ask him to get his bits waxed, his balls nipped, and his penis extended so he looks like the ideal, too). I know there are men who agree with me, and if more women stood up for their right to be unique and have beautifully unique vaginas then, I promise, even more men would agree.

But really. Your vagina is awesome just the way it is. Just like you.

Here is a link to a great article:
http://jezebel.com/5977025/unhappy-with-your-gross-vagina-why-not-try-the-barbie
and here's a link to a tumblr account that shows all kinds of vaginas (even some, gasp, hairy ones):
http://vaginasoftheworld.tumblr.com/page/8

Day After Easter

So, Easter has passed, and today is the first day of the rest of my dietary life (it occurs to me that I'm aaaalll the tiiiime.
going to have to find something new to fast from next Lent). Lent is, of course, over, and I have chosen to continue with the no processed sweeteners with the exception of parties and holidays and situations where it would possibly damage relationships/important impressions. Lent was quite easy this year, once I got past the first week or two and the headache and the feeling crazy hungry

It was much easier than last year, even pleasant. I feel that I learned a lot about eating food in a more godly way, but not a lot about God. Though, I did begin to have Bible times again, so that's something. However; I'm not sure the fast directed my focus to God as much as I was hoping it would. Ah well, there's always next Lent.

That said; I feel that I have a much greater appreciation for food now, for flavors, for the subtlety of flavor. I feel as though I understand more clearly the concept of food "for my joy and nutrition." I also feel much more confident in eating. I don't think anyone could look at anything I eat now and reasonably claim it's unhealthy. Not unless, perhaps, they were a local-organic-raw food-vegan. ;-)

This morning I woke up and knew that I had to work out. I think I was in Korea the last time I woke up and was like "I need water, and exercise, stat." Worked out for 55 minutes instead of my normal 32 and drank a nice amount of water. I watched the Christmas episode of Doctor Who while I was on the stair machine. it was awesome. I felt awesome afterwards. I love working out and feeling awesome! I mean, I hated making myself work out to get thin and feeling guilty afterwards! I love working out because it feels good!

Wasn't really very hungry today but I was really craving healthy food, which was kind of a tough place to be in because I didn't want to eat, but I wanted to eat. I think my body just wanted to make up for what I ate yesterday. My stomach has also been making crazy rumblings all day long.

Today I had:

A banana
A small apple with 1/4 cup of whole fat Greek yogurt
Two scrambled eggs with a sprinkling of cheese
Two pieces of whole sprouted grain sweetener free toast with "buttery spread"
a serving and a half of grass fed beef cooked in a cup and a half of water with organic tomato sauce
1/4 of a large white onion
about 2 cups of steamed kale
extra strong coffee with 1 cup of milk and 2/3 of a tablespoon of local raw honey
a fruit leather
2 (3?) cups of 100% whole grain curly noodle pasta
Oh, and a handful of organic cherry tomatoes



I think this could work.